18 Parli Resolutions from Shamrock Showdown
Round 1
Sea World should free its whales.
In iMessage, read receipts are better left off.
America is modern Rome.
Round 2
The United States should switch to the metric system.
It is better to lose one’s hands than one’s voice.
Samsung’s folding phone will fail.
Round 3
League of Legends should be an Olympic sport.
Art education is at least as important as STEM education.
Humans could live on Mars.
Round 4
The NCAA should allow student athletes to receive compensation.
This house is Spartacus. The year is 73 BC. This house should not rebel.
State lotteries do more good than harm.
Round 5
Governments should suppress hate speech.
Individuals have a moral obligation to serve the greater good.
Chemistry is the most difficult science.
Round 6
Television hosts should avoid interviewing psychics.
Kombucha is the best drink.
New Year’s Resolutions are counterproductive.